"The Sewer Rat Who Saved Arkham (By Complete Accident)"

A multiplayer support deck for Skids O'Toole

or how to learn to love the Mythos while picking its pocket

That you'd all believe a former Irish convict addicted to bar fights and "interest-free loans" (i.e., theft) is the right man to hold together the sanity and survival of an entire group of investigators facing Unspeakable Cosmic Gods... says a lot about how desperate humanity has become. And yet, here we are: Skids O'Toole, the man who'd bum a cigarette off Cthulhu before noticing he no longer has a face, has become — accidentally, I insist — the glue holding this circus of flashlight-wielding neurotics together.

This deck isn't chasing glory. It doesn't care about understanding the Necronomicon or deciphering the impossible angles of R'lyeh. It's after one simple thing: making sure Diana doesn't die, that the professor doesn't run dry on ammo, and that someone, for the love of Yog-Sothoth, deals some cards. Skids didn't come to save the world. He came to make the world owe him one.

Assets (14) — "Here you go, don't thank me, I'll collect later"

2x Psalm Book + 2x Wolf Mask: the perfect devout-and-criminal combo. Skids prays (badly) while disguising himself as whatever he needs to be to avoid getting his face torn off by a Deep One. The Psalm Book is that lukewarm faith of someone who only sets foot in church when Shoggoths are involved; the Wolf Mask is his Plan B, C, and D. Between one scare and the next, Skids manages to survive on faith and a costume — which, in this game, amount to pretty much the same thing.

2x Knife: the classic "just in case," the blade nobody uses until they desperately need it, at which point it becomes your best friend. Cheap, reliable, with all the elegance of someone who solves his problems in an alley.

1x Thompson .45 SMG / 1x Winchester .35: this is where Skids stops being the charming little thief and becomes, for a few turns, the frontline defense nobody asked for but everyone needed. Yes, both are two-handed. Yes, it's an existential dilemma worthy of the Mythos itself: brass knuckles or war cannon? Skids, wisely, picks both depending on the day, because consistency is for investigators with emotional stability.

2x Ancient Sign: the parachute against chaos. When the chaos bag decides everyone deserves a Tentacle or an Auto-fail today, Ancient Sign politely tells the cosmic entity "not today." A humble accessory that has saved more campaigns than any fancy Mythos spell.

2x Leo De Luca: the true silent MVP. This ally doesn't fight, doesn't investigate — he just... exists, replaying events like a personal cosmic slot machine. With Leo in play, every one of Skids's events becomes a jackpot machine that, shockingly, always pays out. The Ancient Ones should fear Leo more than any Sign of the Old Gods.

2x Beat Cop: the irony of an ex-convict recruiting police officers as allies doesn't go unnoticed, and it's exactly the kind of dark humor the Mythos would love if it had any sense of humor (it doesn't — too busy being unfathomable). These allies generate resources, soak up hits, and give Skids a nice plausible alibi on the side.

Events (13) — "The real horror is this campaign's economy"

2x Bank Job + 2x Emergency Cache + 2x Intel Report: the economic trio that turns Skids into an ATM with legs. Combined with Leo De Luca, these cards aren't just played — they're recycled, generating a resource flow so obscene even Azathoth would ask for a loan. The plan is simple: steal, replay, steal again, repeat until the rest of the team has ammunition, spells, and the will to live.

2x Crime Scene: free investigation disguised as police work. With Leo hitting replay over and over, Skids becomes the most efficient detective in Arkham — even if he's only there to forensically lie about why his hands are in the corpse's pockets.

2x Hand of Fate + 2x Deal with the Devil: this is where Skids flirts dangerously with the occult, not because he believes in it, but because it works. Signing pacts with forces he doesn't understand in exchange for immediate benefits is, quite literally, this man's entire life story. The Ancient Ones would be proud of his commitment... if they cared about anything other than the end of the universe.

1x On the Lam: the ultimate panic button. When the "be the team's glue" plan blows up spectacularly, Skids remembers his roots and simply... leaves. With style, of course.

Skills (4) — "The luck of the Irish, literally"

2x Unexpected Courage + 2x Take the Initiative: the generic skill cards every decent deck needs, and which Skids uses with the same blind faith as the Psalm Book — not entirely sure why they work, just that they do. Survival wildcards for when the dice — sorry, the chaos bag — decide to be especially cruel.

Verdict from the Unfathomable Archivist

This isn't a hero's deck. Skids O'Toole isn't going to read the forbidden tome or seal the portal with his own trembling hands. This is a criminal facilitator's deck — the guy who stays in the shadows, prints resources like a clandestine press, shoots when needed, and prays when there's nothing left to do. He's the friend who lends you money with no questions asked, and the same one who, when things go south, reminds you that "running is also a valid strategy."

In a multiplayer campaign, this deck shines precisely by refusing to shine: it feeds the rest of the team resources and cards while covering its own back with a rifle, a mask, and a faith as fragile as it is convenient. The Ancient Ones don't fear Skids because he's powerful. They fear him because, no matter what happens, he always finds a way to skim a cut.

Cosmic rating: 4.5 / 5 tentacles (Half a tentacle docked for the audacity of trying to bribe an Outer God with a Deal with the Devil. The Ancient Ones don't do refunds.)

“At the end of the night, saving humanity from cosmic extinction is not a matter of blind faith, blood sacrifices, or reciting words that fracture reality... It is a simple matter of basic logistics, well-aimed lead, and having the phone number of an excellent lawyer who doesn't ask too many questions.”